Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Oh How We Love To Torture Ourselves

*This post contains spoilers of Synecdoche, New York*

While watching Synecdoche, New York, I found myself puzzled by many scenes of the movie. This is a film in which one can tell that Charlie Kaufman specifically wrote and filmed every tiny bit for a reason. There is one part of the film that I think about more than the others because I can connect with it on a more personal level. Most of us are afraid of death and being alone, but this one is more about how we torture ourselves before death. I am speaking about the trips Caden takes to Germany before Olive dies. Did Caden actually go to Germany at all, or was he simply torturing himself with the thoughts of what could have possibly happened to his beloved daughter Olive?


There are three different times that Caden flies to Germany, and I don't think that he actually got to see his daughter a single time after she moved with her mother. Caden goes to Germany the first time because he sees his daughter's body tattooed in a magazine. He visits Adele's studio to try and visit with Olive, but they will not give him any information. Maria then runs into Caden at a cafe and tells him that he can't see his daughter and that she is the one who tattooed Olive because Olive is her muse. Caden then starts attacking her and she runs away. He runs after her into a back alley where she somehow disappears. This is the first hint that this trip never really happened. Second hint is that this back alley holds the gifts that he sent his daughter through the mail. How could there be a pile of gifts there if each one was sent a year after the other? Clearly this didn't actually happen. Caden breaks down and cries holding onto the box that he bought because he read in Olive's diary that her favorite color was pink.

Now lets back up a bit. A few years before Caden sees his daughter's body tattooed in a magazine he starts reading Olive's diary. The diary describes what it is like to live in Germany. How could this make sense for Olive to forget her diary in America if she wrote it in Germany? Caden keeps reading from her diary throughout the film and she keeps maturing through the years (even one describing that Maria is introducing her to her body). I see this as Caden mentally torturing himself because he won't actually leave to find his daughter and be with her.

The second visit to Germany starts out with Caden on a plane with Madeleine. What surprises me is that I have read people taking this scene literally as well. But Madeleine is on the plane and hits on Caden, but Caden refuses sex with her. After this Caden continues to read in the book and it says since he refused her temptation then she could no longer help him and the book is finished. First of all, why would she actually be on the flight in the first place? She was famous enough to have written all of those books, so one patient dropping her services would not have freed her up that much. I find this to be another scene where Caden is torturing himself. He even refuses to finish the book because he doesn't find himself worthy of fixing himself.

When he arrives in Germany he goes to see his daughter completely naked and dancing behind glass (I don't know what those places are called). He pounds on the glass screaming "Olive! It's Daddy!" The woman completely ignores him and he is dragged out of the building. This thought of his daughter being a naked dancer can be connected with the first thought of seeing his daughter completely naked and tattooed in the magazine. As a father this is the worst fate that he can think of for his daughter, so he continues to torture himself with these thoughts of her showing off her body.

Lastly we have the scene in Germany where he goes back to see his daughter on her death bed. One of the first things Olive talks about was how she and Maria were lovers. This could show the encounter was false because you see Caden fighting for Adele's love with Maria in the beginning, so he imagines it happening with Olive on a more physical level. But Olive tells Caden that Maria told her that Caden wouldn't come see her because he was a homosexual and had a lover named Eric. Caden tells her this isn't true, but she insists that she can't die without forgiving him, but he must admit that he was a homosexual. Caden forces himself to admit that he's a homosexual and he's sorry for abandoning her to have sex with Eric. Olive cries and says she can't forgive him. These are her last words before she dies. This is another moment that shows this could be in Caden's mind and he is torturing himself with these thoughts. He tells himself that no matter what his daughter couldn't forgive him for not trying to find her and be with her. The last thing we see is Maria rushing to Olive and holding her while a petal from the flower tattooed on Olive's arm falls onto the bed. Again, just like at Caden's play, Maria had to be there for an important moment that he wanted to share with just the one that means most to him.


I think with the whole Caden and Olive story we can see that Kaufman is trying to say that we are the most harsh on ourselves. We imagine how terrible everything is without ever getting the true facts. Even if we did get the truth we would tell ourselves it was a lie and resort to more painful thoughts. I know in the past I have thought of the worst possible scenario, yet I was too afraid to see if I was right. Instead I made that the truth and tortured myself with the thoughts. Movies can have many interpretations with each one being just as correct as the last, but this is a subject that I felt passionate about in Synecdoche, New York.